In this post, I will share with you a 4 reasons why it is important for a child to learn to be independent. and be able to find confidence in their abilities.
All children develop and grow at different rates.
The important thing is to provide opportunities for them to practice their independence and develop their skills.
It may be as simple as placing a few toys back in a basket, or as complex as learning how to prepare their favorite meal depending on the maturity level of each individual.
A child of a surprisingly young age, can be ready to become a contributing member of their home.
It seems to me, that all of us are most content when we have a purpose.
We need the opportunity to contribute and serve ourselves and others.
For children in our society, often times there is so much emphasis placed on scholarly and academic success, that simple life skill training is neglected!
Children (we all do) have a deeply held desire to be wanted, needed and helpful. We all want to have purpose in life, and children are no different.
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During my 8 years in the early childhood field, my young ones who were the most capable were the most confident. And I’m not talking about ABC’s.
I’m not saying that every child is the same.
We as parents certainly don’t need to check off a laundry list of “can my child _____?”
What I mean is that each child should be encouraged and allowed to learn and grow at their OWN pace.
Building their repertoire of life skills and experiences is very important.
We as parent must not discourage them from trying because it’s too messy, or takes too long.
You know your child best.
You make the bar where they have to stretch up, but they can reach it!
Whatever the case may be, I’m sure we can all agree that our kids need the opportunities to develop confidence and life skills.
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4 Answers to The Question: Why is it Important for a Child to be Independent?
1. Fosters Responsibility –
A majorly important character trait as an adult, and certainly a child, is responsibility.
It is a trait, shall we say a skill, that even we adults have to train within ourselves.
We must start our kids out with the mindset that they are responsible for their choices and their success in their life.
As parents, we must be our kids biggest encourages, teachers and cheerleaders (not servants or enablers).
This sets the course for a lifetime of responsibility, not an expectation that someone else will take care of it, or someone else can do it better.
2. Builds Confidence –
Being encouraged to take care of themselves with patient teaching, allowing opportunities to fail and try again, and eventually the mastering of tasks, all builds character and great personal confidence.
Confident kids are happy kids.
Help them be confident in your love unconditionally.
Show them through repetition, that their place with you is safe as they learn.
They will flourish at THEIR OWN pace!
3. Instills Long-Term Independence
Many times, I think the main thing that gets in the way of children learning a new life skill, is us parents being impatient.
Life is busy. Life can be frustrating.
A kid trying to buckle their own belt or wanting to lock the door with the key themselves can be painful.
It can make me cringe!
To myself I think “I can do it in 2.78 seconds and I don’t have the time to stand here while you agonize over that button! Here! Let me do it! I will let you practice that another time, just not this minute.” (And full disclosure, I still rush this sometimes.)
I am the world’s worst about this, so this blog post is as much, if not more for my own encouragement as it is for any of my readers!
The part about it being a good long-term plan comes in when we realize that if we invest a small amount of time upfront in training and teaching a skill, and then backing off and allowing them to practice it, down the road that will pay off in ACES.
For parent and child.
So many parent/child interactions have left me thinking, “Oh I wish you understood that a bit of time invested will reward you and your child with a much better experience in the end.”
4. Strengthens Your Relationship –
Lastly, fostering this type of independence with your kids can really build trust and respect between you both.
Our children (all ages) LONG for our approval (even when it doesn’t seem that way) and thrive on the knowledge that we are proud of them and impressed with their abilities.
You can’t fake this, y’all. You can’t tell them “good job” if you don’t really mean it. They will see right through that, I’m here to tell you.
They need to know that what they are capable of is genuinely important and valued… so we need to give them this opportunity. Teach them important stuff, and then as maturity allows, trust them to DO the important stuff.
A note about children feeling important and truly valued…
It may be a cliche, but I’m finding out that my children are some of my biggest teachers.
It is obvious to say that the parents teach the children, but truly, truly, our kids can teach us so much. They are every bit as valuable and have as much to offer in the relationship as the parents do!
“The way I respond to my children in everyday moments gives me the best chance of winning their hearts.”
– Sally Clarkson in her book The Mission of Motherhood
Are You Worried About Your Child Having Skill Gaps?
There will always be gaps in knowledge/skills for all of us, no matter how dedicated our parents were to our upbringing.
There’s no way someone can know or learn it all!
I feel that one of my most important jobs as a parent, apart from raising my kids in the knowledge of Jesus Christ, is to instill the desire to learn and grow as an individual.
To “feed the flame” if you will.
There will be many things that they don’t know when they grow up and leave our nest, but they will be just fine if they have the ability to seek out the right way for themselves.
THAT is what we want them to posses.
If they have the desire to learn and they know how to seek out the information they need, they will be just fine!
Thanks for visiting today! Check out other posts you might like below!
GO SHOPPING for some items that can encourage independence!
Natural Bristle Children’s Broom
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